Skip to content

Republish This Story

* Please read before republishing *

We’re happy to make this story available to republish for free under an Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives Creative Commons license as long as you follow our republishing guidelines, which require that you credit The 19th and retain our pixel. See our full guidelines for more information.

To republish, simply copy the HTML at right, which includes our tracking pixel, all paragraph styles and hyperlinks, the author byline and credit to The 19th. Have questions? Please email [email protected].

— The Editors

Loading...

Modal Gallery

/

Menu

  • Our Mission
  • Our Team
  • Latest Stories
  • Upcoming Events
  • Contact Us
  • Newsletter
  • Donate
  • Work With Us
  • Fellowships
    • From the Collection

      Changing Child Care

      Illustration of a woman feeding a baby a bottle
      • As climate change worsens hurricane season in Louisiana, doulas are ensuring parents can safely feed their babies

        Jessica Kutz · May 5
      • Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito argued abortion isn’t an economic issue. But is that true?

        Chabeli Carrazana · May 4
      • Pregnant people are at 'greater risk' in states hit hard by wildfire smoke, air pollution, new report shows

        Jessica Kutz · April 20
    • From the Collection

      Next-Gen GOP

      Illustration of a woman riding an elephant
      • A banner year for Republican women

        Amanda Becker · November 11
      • Republican women could double representation in the U.S. House

        Amanda Becker · November 4
      • U.S. Rep. Elise Stefanik wants to elect more Republican women into office

        Barbara Rodriguez · August 13
    • From the Collection

      On The Rise

      Illustration of three women marching
      • Jessica Cisneros takes on the last anti-abortion U.S. House Democrat

        Amanda Becker · February 25
      • Meet J. Michelle Childs, South Carolina judge and possible Supreme Court contender

        Candice Norwood · February 18
      • ‘The bench is loaded’: A record number of Latinas are running for governor

        Barbara Rodriguez · February 11
    • From the Collection

      Pandemic Within a Pandemic

      Illustration of four people marching for Black Lives Matter with coronavirus as the backdrop
      • Some LGBTQ+ people worry that the COVID-19 vaccine will affect HIV medication. It won’t.

        Orion Rummler · November 23
      • Why are more men dying from COVID? It’s a complicated story of nature vs. nurture, researchers say

        Mariel Padilla · September 22
      • Few incarcerated women were released during COVID. The ones who remain have struggled.

        Candice Norwood · August 17
    • From the Collection

      Portraits of a Pandemic

      Illustration of a woman wearing a mask and holding up the coronavirus
      • For family caregivers, COVID is a mental health crisis in the making

        Shefali Luthra · October 8
      • A new database tracks COVID-19’s effects on sex and gender

        Shefali Luthra · September 15
      • Pregnant in a pandemic: The 'perfect storm for a crisis'

        Shefali Luthra · August 25
    • From the Collection

      The 19th Explains

      People walking from many articles to one article where they can get the context they need on an issue.
      • The 19th Explains: The governor’s races we’re watching in 2022

        Barbara Rodriguez · May 3
      • The 19th Explains: What to know about Ketanji Brown Jackson’s Supreme Court confirmation hearing

        Candice Norwood, Terri Rupar · March 21
      • The 19th Explains: Colleges are dropping the SAT in admissions. That’s a good thing for most girls.

        Nadra Nittle · March 3
    • From the Collection

      The Electability Myth

      Illustration of three women speaking at podiums
      • Stepping in after tragedy: How political wives became widow lawmakers

        Mariel Padilla · May 24
      • Do term limits help women candidates? New York could be a new testing ground

        Barbara Rodriguez · January 11
      • Girls are being socialized to lose political ambition — and it starts younger than we realized

        Barbara Rodriguez · September 23
    • From the Collection

      The Impact of Aging

      A number of older people walking down a path of information.
      • Woman alleges that an assisted living facility denied her admission because she is transgender

        Sara Luterman · November 8
      • LGBTQ+ seniors fear having to go back in closet for the care they need

        Sara Luterman · October 12
      • The pandemic continues to strain nursing homes. What happens if a lot of them close?

        Mariel Padilla · September 9
    • From the Collection

      Voting Rights

      A series of hands reaching for ballots.
      • Florida’s redistricting fight continues. The head of the state League of Women Voters talks about what’s at stake.

        Barbara Rodriguez · April 19
      • Women have been sounding the alarm ahead of Texas’ first-in-the-nation primary

        Barbara Rodriguez · February 28
      • LGBTQ+ people of color are at risk from rising voter restrictions as federal protections falter in the Senate, advocates say

        Orion Rummler · January 19

    View all collections

  • Explore by Topic

    • Abortion
    • Business & Economy
    • Caregiving
    • Coronavirus
    • Education
    • Election 2020
    • Elections 2022
    • Environment & Climate
    • Health
    • Immigration
    • Inside The 19th
    • Justice
    • LGBTQ+
    • Politics
    • Race
    • Sports
    • Technology

    View All Topics

Home
  • Our Mission
  • Our Team
  • Latest Stories
  • Upcoming Events
  • Contact Us
  • Newsletter
  • Donate
  • Work With Us
  • Fellowships

We’re an independent, nonprofit newsroom reporting on gender, politics and policy. Read our story.

News Fellowships

HBCU alums, become a fellow in our newsroom

Apply Today

Donate to support our fellows

The 19th thanks our sponsors. Become one.

An older person in a wheelchair looks out a glass door. Their face is obscured while the sun shines on their hands.
(Photo by Jasmin Merdan/Getty Images)

Caregiving

LGBTQ+ seniors fear having to go back in closet for the care they need

Re-closeting is an issue in both home care and residential settings, experts say. But specialized care can help LGBTQ+ seniors age in a supportive environment.

Sara Luterman

Caregiving reporter

Sara Luterman, The 19th

Published

2021-10-12 12:41
12:41
October 12, 2021
pm

Share

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Email

Almost everyone faces challenges as they age, but LGBTQ+ seniors face particular risks. As a result, many are going back into the closet to receive long-term care they need. 

Michael Adams, CEO of LGBTQ+ senior advocacy group SAGE, said that more than a third of LGBTQ+ people may hide their sexual orientation or gender identity when they go into elder care for fear of discrimination and mistreatment. 

“And frankly, those fears are reality-based,” Adams said. It is a story he has heard many times from the LGBTQ+ elders SAGE serves. “Re-closeting themselves is a tragedy at that stage of life. It’s erasing every trace of who we are as LGBTQ people.”

The 19th thanks our sponsors. Become one.

In addition to advocacy, SAGE provides volunteers to spend time with LGBTQ+ seniors, who are more likely to be isolated. Adams said he has heard thousands of stories from SAGE’s volunteers and the seniors they serve. 

“There was an elderly gentleman who had a home care attendant coming into his home for the first time. He wanted all of the pictures of him and his partner taken down [out of fear],” Adams said. “He used a walker and was able to get the ones down off the shelves and tables himself, but he couldn’t reach some of the ones on the walls.” SAGE sent a volunteer to help him. “It was heartbreaking to hear that story. And it happens over and over and over again,” Adams said.

It is difficult to know exactly how widespread the problem is. According to a new report from AARP New York and SAGE, a third of LGBTQ+ seniors in New York worry they will have to re-closet themselves to access senior housing and long-term care. This was a particular concern among transgender and gender-nonconforming seniors. Over half reported fear of having to reenter the closet when they seek new housing settings. The issue may be more severe in parts of the country more conservative than New York.

A newsletter you can relate to

Storytelling that represents you, delivered to your inbox.

You have been subscribed!

Submitting…

Uh-oh! Something went wrong. Please try again later.

SAGE has been working on multiple fronts to address danger to LGBTQ+ seniors as they enter long-term care. 

“We have a series of SAGE centers, in the old days you’d call them senior centers, across New York City,” Adams said. “These are places that [LGBTQ seniors] know they can be who they are, and that they’ll be embraced and celebrated for it.” 

They also provide training for general eldercare providers across the United States. “It’s not possible to build an entire parallel universe of services and care for LGBTQ older people,” he explained.

Re-closeting is an issue in both home care and residential settings. Adams expressed particular concern about care agencies and facilities operated by faith traditions hostile to LGBTQ+ people. But secular elder care agencies and facilities still carry risks. “Most agencies have no training and no policies regarding fair, non-discriminatory treatment of LGBTQ elders. So basically, employees are left to their own devices about how they interact with [LGBTQ] elder folk… And the results aren’t pretty.”

Some LGBTQ+ seniors have been more fortunate. Howard Grossman and his husband, Bradford, live in Stonewall House, a senior residence that specializes in serving LGBTQ+ seniors in Brooklyn. The building contains a SAGE senior center and is entirely reserved for seniors making 50 percent or less of the area median income. In order to vie for a spot in the building, prospective residents have to enter a  lottery — spaces are exceeded by demand and need.

There are social workers on site who can help residents access services and support as they age. Bradford, for example, recently started using a walker. There is also a medical coordinator on site. 

Grossman and his husband have been together since the 1980s. They had also long fantasized about living in an LGBTQ+ retirement community. 

“You see the movies and you read the books about gay couples that go to a retirement community, and there’s other gay couples and different lifestyles there, and everybody cohabitates, and you enjoy your aging years,” Grossman explained. 

Still, they didn’t think it was something they’d be able to do themselves: “It’s a great dream, but it’s probably never going to happen for us,” he remembers thinking. 

Then they heard about Stonewall House. They entered a lottery for one of the affordable housing units and got lucky. “I’m so happy I was able to move here. Now I feel safe, and I have a community and I have people I can reach out to,” Grossman said. 

Share

  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Email

News Fellowships

HBCU alums, become a fellow in our newsroom

Apply Today

Donate to support our fellows

From the Collection

The Impact of Aging

A number of older people walking down a path of information.
  • Woman alleges that an assisted living facility denied her admission because she is transgender

    Sara Luterman · November 8
  • The pandemic continues to strain nursing homes. What happens if a lot of them close?

    Mariel Padilla · September 9
  • Democratic lawmakers revive plans to protect women’s retirement

    Mariel Padilla · July 22

Up Next

A woman accompanied by two children is on the phone as people sit near the East River. The manhattan skyline is seen in the background.

Business & Economy

September saw one of the biggest drops in women’s jobs since pandemic began

More than 300,000 women left the labor force last month, the second time in the pandemic that the start of a new school year and loss of child care has caused a major drop-off of women from the workforce.

Read the Story

The 19th
The 19th is a 501(c)(3) tax-exempt organization. Our stories are free to republish in accordance with these guidelines.

  • Donate
  • Subscribe to the Newsletter
  • Attend an Event
  • Jobs
  • Fellowships
  • Contact Us
  • About Us
  • Community Guidelines
  • Membership
  • Membership FAQ
  • Major Gifts
  • Sponsorship
  • Privacy
  • Twitter
  • Facebook
  • Instagram